i’ve done three tarot card readings and the advice is always unaffordable / i figured if flowers love my mom as much as she loves them then they might be able to heal me / so i tell myself that one day i’ll drive three hours to Duluth and stop at a sunflower field halfway there / as a challenge i won’t take pictures.
i know fate exists, because my mom was telling me about her best friend from before i was born and how she wishes they kept in touch / i realized that she is the same woman who talked to me every day at our Kathak classes last summer and who added me to a dance group chat / as of last week, they’re friends again so i know the stars are on our side / since the universe is in charge, we don’t take credit for our good deeds and we don’t take the blame for our bad / there is comfort in this.
now when i drive, i notice patches of purple, white, and yellow weeds on the sides of roads / if my heartrate starts increasing, i focus on the colors / weeds are pretty too and each time, i tell myself i’ll stop and take pictures of them / or i’ll lay all the way back so they surround my face in a selfie / if i use HUJI, I can remember how powerful the sun is, as i watch the app pick up streaks of light and scatter them across the flowers.