It is hard to imagine some 25 years later, but on Sunday, May 24, 1981, the young WJZ-TV reporter and co-host of \u201cPeople Are Talking\u201d stood before the assembled graduates, families, faculty, and staff and confessed that she was more than a little intimidated to be speaking to them.<\/p>\n
After delivering a dead-on impersonation of Dorsey (\u201c\u2018Miss Winn-fray, the women of Gowww-cher have selected you as our commencement speeea-kar.\u2019\u201d), Winfrey\u2014only five years older than most of the graduates she addressed\u2014took a more serious tone as she awakened the graduates to some of the realities they, as women, would face in the workplace and the world at large.<\/p>\n
In her now-classic style, Winfrey quoted poetry from Carolyn Rodgers and Maya Angelou, evoked the words of Sojourner Truth, and offered her own sisterly advice. \u201cYour best is all you\u2019ve got and when you\u2019ve given that you can\u2019t give any more. You just have to give it up \u2026 Therein lies your power, knowing yourself enough to know what your potential and limitations are,\u201d she said. \u201cSome would argue that you have no limitations, only the sky\u2019s the limit. But within that thinking is a reality that says everybody can\u2019t be famous. But we can all be great because greatness is determined by service. How well you serve yourself, your fellow man and woman.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt is an impressive speech, even today,\u201d notes Sheila Ward Siebert \u201981, who retains the copy she requested from WJZ shortly after the ceremony. \u201cWhether you are an Oprah fan or not, you have to admire that her integrity is still intact. She\u2019s remained true to her ideals and philosophies.\u201d<\/p>\n
Dr. Dorsey, Faculty, Students:<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve been trying for weeks now to come up with words that might help me express this great sense of humility and honor for being asked to address the Goucher Graduating Class of 1981. I haven\u2019t found them yet, so I can only say thank you. I am humbled – I am honored. I am grateful for this opportunity to share a bit of myself with you.<\/p>\n
To be quite honest with you, it is one of the most intimidating experiences I\u2019ve ever known. Several years ago, I remember performing my one-woman show at the Lincoln Center in New York and having my friends ask, \u201cWeren\u2019t you nervous? How intimidating!\u201d Intimidated, didn\u2019t know the meaning of the word until six months ago when President Dorsey came to visit me at WJZ with a stack of information this high about Goucher. I didn\u2019t know what was going on, thought it was somebody else wanting to get their school on TV, until she opened her mouth. \u201cMiss Winn-fray, the women of Gowww-cher have selected you as our commencement speeea-kar.\u201d Holy, holy, that\u2019s real grown-up stuff, I thought.<\/p>\n
But I tried to remain cool and not fall out of my chair. Because, as you know, just being in the presence of President Dorsey is enough to intimidate anybody. And if you\u2019re not careful, you\u2019ll start fidgeting and wondering where did I put those little white gloves and why didn\u2019t I wear pumps and pantyhose today instead of these grubby ol\u2019 frye boots. Later that day I strolled into the show office and sort of casually mentioned I was speaking at Goucher\u2019s graduation. Everyone gave a collective gasp. Goucher College???? Oooooooh dear, I thought, what have I gotten myself into? So I decided to pay you all a visit one afternoon to see what all the gasping was about.<\/p>\n
I set foot on this campus and immediately knew. I toured the various facilities, taking a look at what you do here. I\u2019d already heard about this school\u2019s outstanding achievements in academics. The controversy over more emphasis on career orientation rather than liberal arts. I\u2019d heard about how magnificent this campus looks when clothed in the splendor of Spring. I was still most impressed to see it all.<\/p>\n
But the most impressive aspect of this entire college campus was not the grand old dorms or the sculptured auditorium, or even the pervading legacy of achievement that has been left here by so many women before you. The most impressive was YOU. Some of you I met, others I just observed sun\u2026uhmm, pardon me, studying, and I was most impressed. Impressed with your overwhelming and endearing graciousness. Impressed with your intelligence, your perception, your assertiveness, your curiosity, your levelheadedness in spite of the fear. Fear of not knowing what direction your life will take – fear of leaving the security of yet another home. I left here that day also a little fearful. Afraid that I might not know the right words to say to you to make the transition a little easier.<\/p>\n
Because you see, when I was a little girl growing up in Kosciusko, MS, living on a farm alone with my grandmother, the nearest neighbor being Cousin Henry two miles down the road, I used to dream of being just like you. Going to a fine school, having all goals or dreams seemingly within my reach. I used<\/u> to dream. When I became old enough, or wise enough, to realize that I couldn\u2019t be just<\/u> like you. I wanted to be Diana Ross, or just be somebody\u2019s Supreme. It was the longest time before I looked in the mirror and not only accepted, but liked, what I saw. Oprah, Oprah-woman, Oprah-human, Oprah-black. And I tell you it was some kind of revelation. Better than the time I discovered long division. That took forever. Everybody else got it in the third grade. For me, it was Miss Stagg\u2019s second semester fifth-grade class before I really understood why 250 divided by 25 =10. I used to alwaysget confused with numerators and denominators in long division, in life.<\/p>\n
So it was an even greater lesson to learn that you and I really<\/u> are different. And that\u2019s okay. We all have numerators that set us apart – sex, economic background, what your father does or does not do, the schools you could or could not afford – numerators. But the denominator in life as in long division is always the same. No matter who you are – how smart, how pretty, how wealthy. How not – you are, we are, all human. Human beings struggling to keep that denominator constant, struggling to be more human. And I\u2019ve found that the struggle, the sheer challenge of being a decent, caring human being becomes even more difficult when the female factor kicks in. So for a few moments, I want to talk to you about the \u201cFemale Factor\/Power and Powerless.\u201d<\/p>\n
I love my father. He is my history, he is my root, my rock. He raised me to be a very nice girl who treated people nicely. He taught me to never be angry – just reasonable. Reason with people and they reason back, he said. Be nice to people and they will nice you right back. That\u2019s what my Daddy taught me. What he didn\u2019t tell me is that not everybody\u2019s dad was teaching them the same thing.<\/p>\n
So, in situation after situation, I found myself one black woman rendered powerless! Being preyed upon by other people who were not only unreasonable, but just unfair. Powerless because I kept trying to be liked by people who didn\u2019t even like themselves. Powerless! Because I believed the world was one big popularity contest that I had to win or accept failure as a woman – as a human being.<\/p>\n
Although I had the good fortune of being one of the youngest anchors in the country, reading the nightly news on a CBS affiliate in Nashville at the age of 19, I found myself always apologizing to my peers to try to alleviate their jealousies. It didn\u2019t work. I took my entire sophomore Speech Class out to lunch one day to try to make them like me. I thought if I spent enough money on them and laughed a lot they\u2019d know I really was<\/u> a nice person. It didn\u2019t work. It did leave me broke, and Powerless! Not everybody, thank goodness, goes to that extreme. Most people don\u2019t let others undermine their pocketbooks. Even worse they allow others to undermine their spirits, and make us doubt what we know to be true. It is a powerless function – self-doubt, and an unfortunate factor in the female condition we have to fight. Because there is just no room for self-doubt in a world that\u2019s set up to make us feel powerless. A world that is controlled by men.<\/p>\n
Please don\u2019t let your liberated notions fool you. It is a man\u2019s world! And why shouldn\u2019t it be? They\u2019ve been running it for years while we stayed at home with the children, or worked when we could – \u201cto help out.\u201d<\/p>\n
Some of that, of course, has changed. There are more women in management, in corporate rooms and college boards, and in law. Ten years ago, less than three percent of the country\u2019s lawyers were women. Now, 26 percent of law students are women – the greatest increase in any of the professions.<\/p>\n
We can\u2019t deny that our recent strides with women in public and private office are significant. But they are still only whispers. A murmur here and there. Jane O\u2019Reilly says in her book, The Girl I Left Behind<\/i>, \u201cTiny first steps on the private level cannot obscure the obdurate stonewalling going on at the public level.\u201d Men, the so-called new men, who are trying being equal for a while because women have changed and they have to respond. These new men who now want to talk about their feelings and the old men who now don\u2019t know what feelings are and assume that it is their \u201cGod-given right\u201d to have domination over women. These men are still the people making public policies. Policies that are currently geared to deny our right to choose what to do with our own bodies. Policies that maintain women at half the wage level of men. Policies that ignore the fact that three-quarters of the poor people in this country are women, people and their children.<\/p>\n
That is why inflation among other things is a woman\u2019s issue. And a main factor in this power struggle. Women earn, on the average, 59 cents for every dollar men earn. So when people start talking about reductions in spending power whether it\u2019s seven percent or 17 percent or, God forbid, 70 percent, it is women who will feel it – who will hurt the most because people who earn 59 cents on the dollar have a hard time just surviving. Women right now make up 41.7 percent of the entire labor force. Eighty percent of those women are concentrated in jobs at the low end of the pay scale – in retail stores, factories, service industries, as waitresses, maids, and clerical occupations. A low paying job is usually a powerless job – no benefits, no security.<\/p>\n
Ahhhh – but you say, \u201cWhy tell me this? I\u2019m a Goucher grad – prestigious school, training, background – the works. And I say to you the same words that were echoed time and again by the slaves, \u201cAin\u2019t nobody free \u2018til we all is free.\u201d<\/p>\n
Jane O\u2019Reilly updates that statement. She says, \u201cIn the end we are all housewives – the natural people to turn to when there is something unpleasant, inconvenient, or inconclusive to be done. It will not do for women who have jobs to pretend that society\u2019s ills will be cured if all women are gainfully employed. In Russia 80 percent of working age women are employed outside the home, but none of them is at the top level of government. They are however still in charge of all of the housework. It will not do for women who are mostly housewives to say that women\u2019s lib is fine for women who work but has no relevance for them. Equal pay for equal work is only part of the argument – usually described as the part I\u2019ll go along with. We are all housewives. We would prefer to be people. That\u2019s the part they don\u2019t go along with.\u201d<\/p>\n
And I say to you – women are 70 percent of hospital workers, but 90 percent of all doctors are men. Women are 67 percent of public school teachers, but only two percent of secondary school principals and 18 percent of primary school principals are women. Women are only 15 percent of trustees and regents on university and college governing boards. Out of the 6,400 officers and directors of the 1,300 largest companies, only 10 are women. TEN!<\/p>\n
This scant intrusion by women upon the upper ranks of the working world is not because we are stupid or lack self confidence or have a poorly developed work ethic. It is because, as Rosabeth Kanter, author of Men and Women of the Corporation<\/i>, put it, \u201cIt\u2019s hard to be a team player when they don\u2019t want you on their team.\u201d<\/p>\n
And so we don our business suits, dressed for success with out Louis Vitton briefcases in hand, and try to accept the fact that it is a man\u2019s world and we have to play by their rules for now. So we try to do whatever we can to fulfill our potential – to earn a dollar. Because unlike our mothers, we know that by the time we are middle-aged we have more than a 50 percent chance of never being married, divorced, widowed, or separated. So there\u2019s no denying the obvious. We have to take care of ourselves – and the children. We must find what bits of love we can and be on with it, knowing that we will have our friends. Because unlike our mothers we also know that should that white knight (or black knight) in shining armor come riding along he will probably be gay – or just confused. Which brings us to the most powerless, rendering position of all – the love game. Which is also almost always played by the man\u2019s rules. Again Jane O\u2019Reilly says, \u201cThe men who say they do not know how to love speak the simple truth. Love for men used to be handing over the paycheck and having the final word. They have not yet had time to realize that they have been released from a tremendous burden if they are no longer expected to spend their lives solely supporting women and children. Instead of learning to share responsibility a lot of them are still grieving for their lost authority. When they murmur as explanation, \u2018I\u2019m not sure I know what love is,\u2019 they mean they are afraid of what they think it is. Impossibly idealistic men imagine love as something frightening and weakening, something that will devour them – something that can never be lived up to – something that interrupts life and somehow endangers and diminishes the lover. They withdraw, and women are supposed to coax them out. We are expected to try to understand and explain what love is. We are, in other words, supposed to do all the heavy lifting in the relationship.\u201d<\/p>\n
It\u2019s frustrating and lonely, this love game – that is if you\u2019re lucky enough to have a relationship with someone who\u2019s worth the trouble. No doubt one of your single greatest disappointments upon leaving here will be to discover that the reason you haven\u2019t had a decent date for four years is not because you were at a woman\u2019s college, but because the kind of man you\u2019re looking for just isn\u2019t there. It\u2019s a grave disappointment because even those of us who consider ourselves liberated often harbor in the back of our minds those old wishful thoughts that we\u2019re just biding our time until \u201cMr. Right\u201d comes along. Carolyn Rodgers says in her poem:<\/p>\n
We are
\nlonely women, who spend time waiting for occasional flings
\nwe are talented, dedicated, well read
\nwe are lonely.
\nwe grow tired\u2026
\nbeing soft and being hard
\nearning our own bread.
\nsoft\/hard\/hard\/soft\/
\nknowing that need must not show
\nwill frighten away
\nknowing that we must
\nwalk backwards nonchalantly on our tip-toesssss
\ninto
\nhappiness,
\nif only for stingy moments
\nwe buy clothes, we take trips,
\nwe wish, we pray, we meditate, we curse, we crave,
\nwe coo, we caw
\nwe need ourselves sick, we need, we need
\nwe lonely we grow tired of tears we grow tired of fear
\nwe grow tired but must always be soft and not too serious
\nnot too smart not too bitchy not too sapphire
\nnot too dumb not too not too not too
\na little less a little more
\nadd here detract there
\n.lonely.<\/p>\n
[From how i got ovah, New and Selected Poems<\/i> by Carolyn M. Rodgers; Anchor Books, Anchor Press\/Doubleday; Garden City, New York, 1976.]<\/p>\n
LONELY – because we continue to make the powerless mistake of judging our self-worth by the kind of man we can attract.<\/p>\n
It is not a very happy picture, self-doubt, discrimination, inflation, lost loves, and loneliness. But each of us has the power to make a difference. It is not an easy battle, this struggle to be human.<\/p>\n
You\u2019ve got to be armored before you can claim the victory. And the best ammunition is a developed mind and disciplined spirit, combined with the wisdom that, less than your best, is a sin. But your best is all you\u2019ve got and when you\u2019ve given that you can\u2019t give any more. You just have to give it up. That applies to all situations – bosses to boyfriends. Therein lies your power, knowing yourself enough to know what your potential and limitations are. Some would argue that you have no limitations, only the sky\u2019s the limit. But within that thinking is a reality that says everybody can\u2019t be famous. But we can all be great because greatness is determined by service. How well you serve yourself, your fellow man and woman.<\/p>\n
Know that you and your God are the most powerful force you\u2019ve got. And learn how to tap into that power. You see, prayer is the taproot and sometimes you have to act as if everything depended upon you, but pray as if everything depended upon God. You see, prayer is not the power but it provides transportation to the source. It\u2019s like a room wired for electricity complete with chandeliers, and lanterns, and floor lights, and strobe lights, and a switch that\u2019s in the far corner of the room. Some people walk into that room and curse the darkness. Others take time and look for the switch way over there in the far corner of the room, and when they find it they just turn it on. Turn on that power! We all can do it. No matter what your numerator is, we are all phenomenal women.<\/p>\n
Maya Angelou says it best in her poem, \u201cPhenomenal Woman\u201d:<\/p>\n
Pretty women wonder
\njust where my secret lies
\ncause I\u2019m not cute or built
\nto suit a fashion model\u2019s size
\nbut when I try to tell them
\nthey say I\u2019m telling lies
\nI say it\u2019s in the reach of my arms
\nthe span of my hips
\nthe stride in my step
\nthe curl in my lips
\ncause I\u2019m a woman
\nphenomenally,
\nphenomenal woman,
\nthat\u2019s me.<\/p>\n
I walk into a room
\njust as cool as you please
\nand to a man
\nthe fellows stand or fall down
\non their knees,
\nand then they swarm around me
\na hive of honeybees
\nI say it\u2019s the fire in my eyes
\nthe flash of my teeth
\nthe swing in my waist
\nthe joy in my feet
\nI\u2019m a woman phenomenally,
\nphenomenal woman
\nthat\u2019s me.<\/p>\n
Men themselves have wondered
\njust what they see in me
\nthey try so much
\nbut just can\u2019t touch
\nmy inner mystery
\nwhen I try to show them
\nthey say they still can\u2019t see
\nI say it\u2019s in the arch of my back
\nthe sun of my smile
\nthe rise of my breasts
\nthe grace of my style
\nI\u2019m a woman phenomenally
\nphenomenal woman
\nthat\u2019s me.<\/p>\n
Now you understand
\nwhy my head\u2019s not bowed
\nI don\u2019t shout or jump about
\nor have to talk real loud
\nbut when you see my passing
\nit ought to make you proud.
\nI say it\u2019s in the click of my heels
\nthe bend of my hair
\nthe palm of my hand
\nthe need for my care
\ncause I\u2019m a woman phenomenally
\nphenomenal woman
\nthat\u2019s me.<\/p>\n
and if each of us is a phenomenon how greater still are we together.<\/p>\n
In closing, I\u2019d like to remind you of another speech given by another woman before a group of daring women who were rallying for their rights at a convention in Akron, OH, in 1891. Proud, inspiring, powerful, Sojourner Truth walked to the podium and spoke.<\/p>\n
\u201cW\u2019all chillum where there is so much racket there is bound to be somethin\u2019 out of kilter. I think twixt the womens at the North and the niggers at the South, white man\u2019s gon\u2019 be in a fix pretty soon.<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd what\u2019s all this here commotion about women\u2019s rights? That little man ober there say, \u2018Women ought not to have as much rights as men, cause women needs to be helped into carriages and ober mud puddles.\u2019 W\u2019all! Ain\u2019t nobody helping me into no carriages and ain\u2019t nobody helped me ober narry a mud puddle, and ain\u2019t I a woman? And that little fella in black there say women ought not to have as much rights as men cause Christ w\u2019arnt a woman. I say, where\u2019d your Christ come from? You heard me, where\u2019d your Christ come from? He come from God and he come from a woman! Man ain\u2019t had nuthin\u2019 to do with him!<\/p>\n
\u201cEverywhere I go people wants to talk to me about this women\u2019s rights. I tells them just like I\u2019m telling you now. It seems to me if one woman, Eve, was able to turn this world upside down all by herself, then all of us womens in here together ought to be able to turn it right side up! And now that we\u2019s askin\u2019to do it, y\u2019all mens better let us!\u201d<\/p>\n
Peace and power to you all!<\/p>\n
Thank you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
There is little that Oprah Winfrey can\u2019t lay claim to on her resum\u00e9, including Goucher College Commencement speaker.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":312,"featured_media":3844,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[7935,55802],"tags":[55802],"ppma_author":[87543],"class_list":["post-3835","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-goucher-today","category-web-exclusive","tag-web-exclusive"],"yoast_head":"\n